


I'wak Mesukh-Yut t'on

by antlervelvet777



Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-12
Updated: 2020-04-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:15:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23618857
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/antlervelvet777/pseuds/antlervelvet777
Summary: The Present is the Crossroads of Both Future and Past"Spock had not meant to show this new James so much, but what is done cannot now be undone. So Spock allows himself a humans share of hope; as they settle around this newly kindled fire, that Kirk had not seen the way that their souls were shaped to fit together. Had not seen the ease with which they had become of one mind, the years of intimate familiarity only barely kept secret by Spock's carefully trained restraint."A brief look into Spock Prime's mind when he finds Kirk stranded on Delta Vega.
Relationships: James T. Kirk/Spock, James T. Kirk/Spock Prime
Comments: 2
Kudos: 34





	I'wak Mesukh-Yut t'on

From the mind meld with Spock prime, Kirk learned more than he was meant to. The emotional transference was accidental, yes; but years alone, of missing half of himself had left Spock with weak spots in his mental armor. With soft places that still ached with loss. His Katra left bereft, forever reaching for another, one particular mind; his T'hy'la. Or so he had thought as recently as his waking this morning, which was simultaneously mere hours ago and decades into a now unknown future.

If there was ever any convincing argument for fate it was Spock meeting Kirk here on this hostile and frozen planet, for the thousandth and for the first time altogether. No, the emotional transference was not intentional. Yet when Spock locked eyes with this stranger and in that instant _knew_ him, a fire roared back to life in his very core. His Katra was set burning anew as memories of a lifetime of loving and of being loved threatened to overwhelm the aged Vulcan. Him. It's him. Together again out of time, all at once strangers and dearly beloved. The radiant joy of this chance meeting is illogical, yes, but there all the same. It was on a Vulcan's pride that he could school his expression, even in the face of certain death, but Spock could not contain the smile dawning across his stony face.

"James T. Kirk!"

Yes, a mind meld was the logical choice. But if Spock was being honest with himself, and he rarely wasn't; it was not the right one. The implications of his presence here, thrown out of his time and into this new one- this wasn't his Jim. The ripple effects caused by the black hole, by the Romulan Nero, were in this moment unknowable. Who really is this man, standing before him in shock, shivering with the cold only now in the relative safety of this cave. James Tiberius Kirk, there was no doubt. But what forces had brought him here, today of all days? The death of Vulcan was so fresh his mind still rang, echoing with the single scream of the millions lost in that one terrible instant.

Revealing anything to this James Kirk about his future, or what was his future once, would forever change how he saw his world. Spock could just as easily drive Jim from every familiar path his future would take as send him running headlong down some path foolishly thinking its outcome set in stone. Yet there was so much that needed to be said, to be communicated more deeply than mere spoken work could ever attempt. In order for them both to navigate this new and strange future, Jim would need to understand the forces that brought him here in the first place.

So a mind meld it was. Being the most straightforward way to communicate all that was needed. Though now, in his old age Spock was more easily able to discern those moments when he sought the logical paths more closely suited to what he wanted. Yes, wanted. And admittedly, feeling more vulnerable and more alone than he had in lifetimes, Spock wanted nothing more than to place his tired hands carefully to the meld points on this familiar face and to feel this mind against his own again; to sink into its familiarity and warmth. Yes, if he was being honest, it was a path chosen selfishly.

Spock had not meant to show this new James so much, but what is done cannot now be undone. So Spock allows himself a humans share of hope, that now as they settle around this newly kindled fire, that Kirk had not seen the way that their souls were shaped to fit together. That he had not seen the ease with which they had become of one mind, the years of intimate familiarity only barely kept secret by Spock's carefully trained restraint.

A not quite comfortable silence settles over the pair as they share in the warmth of the fire between them. Too many questions to possibly answer in the scant hours between now and the first light of morning. They hang heavy in the chilled air around them- whirling about silently like the so many stars they had sailed through together, now lifetimes apart. 

Jim was uncharacteristically silent sitting there, though Spock could just as easily feel the human's emotions radiating from him as he could read them plainly from his face- a skill he had long ago mastered and never again thought he would have use for.

This Jim, and this new Spock were strangers now, their destinies sent spinning in new and unknown directions. If there was such a thing as fate, such a thing as those who were destined to know and to love each other, to fit together so perfectly, this Jim and this Spock would undoubtedly find each other again. Would collide again as with the force and brilliance of two colliding stars and emerge together, a binary system, burning brightly in a new and intricate balance. It had happened once at least, and that was enough for the old Vulcan to will it to happen again, here; as Vulcan tradition holds that the bond of T'hy'la is one that transcends lifetimes. Here Spock would have the unique opportunity to wait and see if once again, not knowing that they are pieces of the same whole, if these two who in one lifetime fit so perfectly together, would find and complete each other again. If T'hy'la transcends time as well- only the future could reveal. 

The old Vulcan chides himself at the sheer sentimentality of his musings, but only halfheartedly- as one can afford oneself certain luxuries in such strange and troubled times. He reaches to the pile of gathered shrub brush to his side and pulls a few branches free, placing them with care on their small fire. A shower of tiny sparks floats upward with the smoke, the crackle of the fire and its radiating warmth serve as an excellent point for grounding himself in the reality of the here and now. His past and his unfolding future sharing the same moment. Spock takes a measured breath and finally casts his gaze with intention through the smoke to meet the insistent and familiar blue eyes of the human seated across from him.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm trying to find my writing voice again after years of, well, not writing. So please let me know what you think. Thank you for reading :)
> 
> Sochya eh dif <3


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